Living together and settling in
How do we set rules for mobile phone use and social media?
Short answer
You should discuss which rules apply for phone, television and social media clearly with your au pair from the start. Mobile phone use may be restricted during working hours - for example, you can agree that the private phone stays in the room. Equally important are clear rules on photos of your children, social media and screen time. What seems obvious to you, your au pair can only know if you say it out loud.
Last updated: 13.08.2026
What lies behind it
How families handle smartphones and social media differs from one household to another - and there are also large cultural differences. That is why we recommend not simply assuming your rules are understood, but discussing them together right at the start.
If you do not want your au pair to be on their phone privately during childcare, say so clearly. Family and friends can be called before or after working hours. During working hours, attention should be on the children and the agreed tasks. You can of course agree exceptions individually, for example for important calls or where the phone is needed to stay reachable while out and about.
Photos and social media are also particularly important: may your au pair take photos of your children? May they send these privately to their own family? May pictures be published on social networks at all? There should be no unspoken assumptions here, but a clear agreement.
The same applies to the children's media use: how much television or tablet time is allowed? You set the family rules - but your au pair needs to know them in order to follow them.