Diagnosis & need
Au pair support for a child with a physical disability
Support for families with a child with a physical disability
When a child lives with a physical disability, everyday family life can require additional organisation and support.
Kindergarten or school, therapies, leisure activities, siblings, work and everyday appointments all need to be fitted together. Depending on the type of physical disability, a child may also need more time or support with individual activities.
An au pair for a child with a physical disability can accompany families in daily life and create valuable relief.
At Besondere Sterne, we place au pairs specifically with families with children with and without a disability or additional needs.
For us, the diagnosis alone is never the main focus. What matters is the question:
What can your child already do independently, and where do they need support in everyday life?
A physical disability can look very different from child to child
A physical disability can be present from birth or develop over the course of a child's life.
Some children can walk independently but need support with certain movements. Others use walking aids, orthoses or a wheelchair. Some children have limitations of fine motor skills, others need support with longer distances or particular everyday tasks.
Conditions and diagnoses such as cerebral palsy, spina bifida, neuromuscular conditions or rare genetic conditions can also be associated with physical limitations.
The physical disability on its own says little about how independent a child is in everyday life.
That is why, when making a placement, we always look at the individual child and their actual support needs.
How can an au pair support a family with a child with a physical disability?
An au pair can take on many everyday tasks and accompany a child through the things that are part of their normal daily routine.
Depending on the child's age, independence and support needs, an au pair might, for example:
- play, read, do craft activities or spend time outdoors together,
- accompany the school or kindergarten run,
- accompany the child to leisure activities or therapy appointments,
- support everyday routines,
- allow more time for getting dressed independently or other activities,
- help prepare clothes, a school bag or aids,
- be present and supportive during leisure activities,
- accompany playground visits and outings,
- look after siblings,
- prepare simple meals for the children,
- take on light everyday tasks involving the children,
- provide babysitting within the agreed working hours.
Which of these tasks are possible and sensible always depends on the individual child and their family situation.
Supporting independence rather than taking everything over
A child with a physical disability may need longer for certain things — but can often still do them for themselves.
This is exactly where an additional person in everyday life can be valuable.
When three children need to be ready at the same time in the morning, there is sometimes simply no time to wait ten minutes for a child to close their own jacket or complete a task at their own pace.
An au pair can create this time.
They can accompany, support and help where help is genuinely needed — without automatically taking everything off a child.
Because support can also mean:
I am here if you need me. But I will give you the time to try it yourself.
Taking part in perfectly ordinary family life
Visiting friends. Going to the playground. Having an ice cream. Going to sport. Doing craft activities. Swimming. Spending an afternoon outdoors.
A physical disability does not mean that free time and shared activities matter any less.
Depending on the child's individual abilities, an au pair can help make such activities possible in everyday life.
Perhaps they accompany a child to a hobby. Perhaps they spend an afternoon at home with them. Perhaps they look after siblings while parents attend a therapy or medical appointment.
Relief can look very different from family to family.
When a wheelchair or other aids are part of everyday life
Children who use a wheelchair, a walking aid, orthoses or other aids can, in principle, also be accompanied by an au pair in everyday life.
It is important to discuss openly, before the placement, what support is actually needed.
Can the child transfer into their wheelchair independently? Does a wheelchair simply need to be pushed? Are there situations where physical transfers are necessary? Which routes are accessible? Which tasks are carried out by parents or professionals?
The more precisely these questions are clarified, the more realistically the family and the au pair can assess whether the tasks are a good fit for an au pair placement.
An au pair is not a carer
This distinction matters especially to us when it comes to a physical disability.
An au pair is not a qualified care professional, not a therapist and not a medical professional.
They do not provide medical treatment, professional nursing care or tasks that require a particular nursing or medical qualification.
If a child needs regular medical care or extensive nursing support, for example, this must continue to be provided by parents or by appropriately qualified people.
An au pair can, however, take on many other areas of everyday family life alongside this.
And this is exactly where valuable relief can arise.
Support can also start with the siblings
The au pair does not always need to mainly look after the child with a physical disability.
Especially when a child has many therapy, medical or support appointments, it can be far more helpful for a family if the au pair is there for the siblings during this time.
They can collect a sibling from kindergarten, take them to sport, do homework together or spend an afternoon at the playground.
This means siblings do not automatically have to join every appointment — and parents can focus on the child who needs them at that moment.
Which au pair suits a child with a physical disability?
That depends heavily on the individual everyday life of the family.
For some families, an active au pair who enjoys being out and about and accompanies children to leisure activities matters most.
Others need a particularly patient person because everyday routines take more time.
If a child uses a wheelchair or other aids, it can also be important that the au pair has no reservations about this and is willing to learn how to use it.
Depending on the support needs, we also look at whether an au pair already has experience with children with a disability.
What remains decisive, though:
It is not the disability that has to suit the au pair — the person has to suit the family.
When several particularities occur together
A physical disability can exist on its own or alongside other particularities.
Some children, for example, also live with a developmental delay, epilepsy, an intellectual disability, a sensory disability, a chronic or rare condition, or a genetic condition.
Multiple disabilities are therefore not a reason to rule out an enquiry with Besondere Sterne.
In these cases, we look especially closely at which tasks actually arise in everyday life and which of these can sensibly be taken on by an au pair.
Finding an au pair for a child with a physical disability
At Besondere Sterne, we support families with children with a physical disability in finding a suitable au pair.
Together, we look at what your child can already do independently, where they need support and where an au pair could sensibly bring relief to your everyday family life.
You can then get to know suitable au pairs and decide for yourself which person is the right fit for your child and your family.
Getting to know each other
Looking for an au pair for a child with a physical disability?
Then get to know our au pairs and find support that fits your everyday family life.
Besondere Sterne is an au pair agency — not a special-education service and not an advice centre. For legal and specialist questions there is the EUTB: teilhabeberatung.de. Go to whichever advice centre you feel comfortable with.