Diagnosis & need
Au pair support for a child with a chronic illness
Support for families with a child with a chronic illness
When a child has a chronic illness, the illness is often simply part of everyday family life – and at the same time it can keep changing that everyday life.
Doctor's appointments, therapies, examinations or hospital stays have to be fitted around kindergarten, school, work, free time and the needs of any siblings. On top of that come phases when the child is doing well, and possibly times when they need noticeably more rest, support or attention.
An au pair for a family with a chronically ill child can support many parts of daily life and provide valuable relief.
At Besondere Sterne, we place au pairs specifically with families with children with and without a disability or additional needs – including families with children with chronic illnesses.
Chronic illness in everyday family life
Chronic illnesses in childhood can be very different from one another.
Some conditions affect everyday life only a little. Others bring regular medical or therapy appointments, or mean that a child is at times less resilient.
The effects of an illness can also change over time.
That is why the term "chronically ill child" on its own says little about what support a family actually needs.
For us, the diagnosis is therefore not the only thing that matters.
We want to know:
What does your everyday family life look like – and where do you need an extra helping hand?
How can an au pair support a family with a chronic illness?
An au pair can take on many tasks around the children and everyday family life that are separate from medical care.
Depending on the age of the children and the family situation, an au pair can, for example:
- play, read, do crafts or spend time outdoors together,
- take on kindergarten or school runs,
- accompany children to leisure activities,
- support everyday routines,
- spend afternoons at home with the children,
- prepare simple meals for the children,
- take on light tasks around the children,
- look after siblings,
- stay with one child while parents are out with a sibling,
- take on babysitting within the agreed working hours.
Especially when many extra appointments are part of family life, tasks like these that seem small can provide a great deal of relief.
When not every day can be planned in the same way
Chronic illnesses do not always keep to a family calendar.
There can be good phases, when a child wants to do a lot and is barely limited in everyday life.
And there can be days when more rest is needed or plans have to change at short notice.
An au pair can help absorb this flexibility in everyday family life.
A planned afternoon at the playground might turn into a quiet afternoon at home.
A doctor's appointment might come up at short notice, and the au pair takes over looking after the siblings.
Or a parent spends several hours with one child at a clinic while, at home, kindergarten, school and dinner for the other children carry on regardless.
An extra person can absorb a great deal in exactly these situations.
Relief around medical, hospital and therapy appointments
Families with a chronically ill child often spend more time at doctors, in hospitals or at therapy sessions than other families.
Especially with several children, this raises a very practical question:
Who looks after the siblings in the meantime?
This is where an au pair can be an important support.
They can, for example, collect a sibling from kindergarten or school, spend the afternoon with them, take them to sport, or simply be there for the children at home.
This means siblings do not have to attend every appointment, and parents can focus on the child who needs them during a medical or hospital appointment.
An au pair does not provide medical care
With chronic illnesses, this boundary is particularly important.
An au pair is not a carer and not a medical professional.
Medical care and tasks that require medical or nursing expertise are not part of an au pair's regular duties.
An au pair therefore does not replace a nursing service, medical care or therapy.
Before a placement, it should be discussed openly what medical requirements exist in everyday life and which tasks are carried out exclusively by parents or by appropriately qualified people.
This does not mean, however, that an au pair cannot help a family with a chronically ill child.
On the contrary:
While parents and professionals take care of medical care, the au pair can take the pressure off the everyday family life around it.
A child is more than their illness
Amid all the medical appointments and organisational challenges, one thing should not be lost:
A chronically ill child is, first of all, a child.
They want to play, laugh, meet friends, do crafts, listen to stories, be outside, watch a film, or simply spend an ordinary afternoon.
An au pair does not come into the family as a medical carer.
They can instead be an additional young person the child trusts, someone with whom exactly these everyday things happen.
Not every afternoon together has to revolve around the illness.
Which au pair suits a family with a chronically ill child?
This depends less on the name of the illness than on the individual family situation.
Perhaps you would like a particularly calm and reliable au pair.
Perhaps you need someone who can react flexibly when plans change at short notice.
Perhaps it matters to you that the au pair already has experience with children with additional needs.
Or perhaps you are mainly looking for support for the siblings.
At Besondere Sterne, we therefore look at which tasks actually need to be taken on and which personality suits your family.
When a disability is also present
A chronic illness can exist on its own or alongside other additional needs.
Some children also live with a physical disability, a developmental delay, a learning disability, a sensory disability, epilepsy, a genetic condition or a rare condition.
Here too, we do not just look at individual diagnoses.
What matters is the overall picture:
What does your child need? What does your family need? And which tasks can an au pair sensibly take on?
Support for the whole family
An au pair does not have to be there exclusively for the chronically ill child.
Sometimes the greatest relief happens somewhere else entirely.
The au pair takes a sibling to sport.
They take over a school run.
They spend an afternoon at the playground with the other children.
Or they keep normal family life running at home while a parent attends a longer appointment with the ill child.
This way, support can happen wherever it helps the whole family most.
Finding an au pair for a family with a chronically ill child
At Besondere Sterne, we support families with chronically ill children in finding a suitable au pair.
Together, we look at what effect the illness has on your everyday family life, where you need support, and which tasks an au pair can sensibly take on.
You can then get to know suitable au pairs and decide for yourself which person is right for your children and your family.
Getting to know each other
Looking for support in everyday life with a chronically ill child?
Then get to know our au pairs and find an au pair who fits your everyday family life.
Besondere Sterne is an au pair agency — not a special-education service and not an advice centre. For legal and specialist questions there is the EUTB: teilhabeberatung.de. Go to whichever advice centre you feel comfortable with.